That was the year of letting go
The year I sat this body down and taught it how to forgive
The year I broke this body in half and searched for the best parts of myself
The year I learned how to smile at strangers and mean it
The year I found God in myself and loved her so deeply.
The year before; I let a boy pull me close
I let him name home for me
I let him call me beautiful in a language that was not my own
I wanted to be loved so desperately I let a boy put the girl of his dreams inside this body.
In the year we learned how to love
I forgave the girl I pulled from a boy’s mouth
I forgave myself
I forgave myself for all the things I was never going to become.
That was the year of making peace
The year I learned how to stop men from mistaking my body for an ashtray a place where
flickering things go to die did you forget I found God in this body?
I am the flickering thing and I would burn this place to the ground before you can mistake
my body for a place where things go to die.
Can’t you see all that I have survived?
Can’t you see how much I have spit on this world that tried to kill me?
No one will take this away from me.
Sonia Ogbeh is a software developer, writer and performance poet who hungers for places she has never been to. She won the Abuja Literary Society Grand Slam in 2016.
Twitter Handle: _nxxcole